Yesterday, being Fathers' Day, I thought about my Dad, and fathers in general, a lot.
I was also reading Caitlin Moran's very fine new book
and realised that my Dad is my feminist hero.
Its not that he does his fair share of domestic work or campaigns for women's right - for he doesn't.
In fact the idea of my Dad being a feminist of any sort would bring on snorts around the breakfast table.
Its just that he brought me up to be blessedly unconcerned about what the wider world may think, to assess whether society's norms were "fun" and, if not, to dismiss them as fluff and fear.
If I enjoy playing about with make up, if hair dye is fun, if red shiny high heels make me dance - then I should go ahead - BUT if I'm covering my face through worry, if the shoes cramp my style, if I am trying to fight my age - well I should think about the whys and whether they will make me happy.
So I've gone through my life doing only the minimal in many areas - you won't find me up at 3am making miniature gardens for Brownies' shows, you won't find me in a flap about party bags or manically scrubbing the house before anyone can come in.
I cheerfully accept I could never do ballet hair or have feet that look good in sandals.
Which really frees up time for things that I enjoy - like reading Caitlin Moran's book.
I laughed so much through it that there is a queue forming to get it after me - Euan (my other feminist hero) is having it for Dougalling reading at the weekend.
Agreeagreeagree! Love this post, and am going to show it to my 12 year old daughter! Esp. the 'fluff and fear' bit. You so often hit the nail on the head. x
Posted by: Belinda | June 20, 2011 at 09:38 AM
What a lovely post and what a lovely Daddy x
Posted by: Alexisjohnstonormolu.wordpress.com | June 20, 2011 at 11:12 AM
the book is getting a thumbs up all round by the look of it
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2011/jun/20/caitlin-moran-how-to-be-a-woman
Posted by: nic@nipitinthebud | June 20, 2011 at 12:19 PM
What a handsome chap your dad is! And, so wise. My husband, and my son, are dad's like this - which is 'freeing' for me (who didn't have a dad like this) and for the rest of us girls and boys in our family. Enjoy your dougalling at the weekend. xx
Posted by: Karen | June 20, 2011 at 08:09 PM